Say Hello to My Chromatic Saron

Growing up in Malaysia, I was drawn to the gamelan. The gamelan is my favorite traditional instrument. I love the mesmerizing and hypnotic sound. 

Now that music is my career, I've been on a mission to incorporate the gamelan into my songs, allowing others to experience its beauty.

It was a dream come true when I had a custom chromatic gamelan saron built for me some time ago. This was truly a labor of love, as the process was long and challenging. Finding the right builder, navigating communication barriers due to their remote location, and then shipping the heavy instrument all the way from Indonesia to Malaysia proved to be no easy feat.

Before I received my gamelan saron, I had to rely on recorded samples rather than live instruments, which made it difficult to seamlessly blend the gamelan's unique tunings and modes with my Western-influenced pop music. I've been called crazy many times! But I was determined to find a solution, as fusing traditional and contemporary sounds was central to my artistic vision.

When the custom-built saron finally arrived at my home in Kuala Lumpur, the journey was far from over. I then had to carefully transport this precious instrument halfway across the world, from Malaysia to Los Angeles. It was an East-meets-West odyssey, but one that was well worth the effort.

My musical dreams were finally coming to fruition as I was able to play, record, and incorporate my chromatic gamelan saron into my song "You Are My Land." It was a surreal experience, and I had to keep reminding myself that this was real. Despite the many challenges and naysayers along the way, I persevered, driven by my unwavering passion for this instrument and my vision of blending cultures through music.

I hope that by sharing the story of my gamelan saron, I can inspire others to embrace their unique artistic passions, no matter how unconventional they may seem. As Steve Jobs once said, "The ones who are crazy enough to think they can change the world are the ones who do." I may have been called "crazy" at times, but I'm proud to be a misfit, a rebel, and a changemaker in the world of music.

I invite you to listen to the captivating tones of my gamelan saron in "You Are My Land" and fall in love with this beautiful instrument, just as I have. I can't wait to share more of this East-meets-West fusion with you in my upcoming tracks.

"Here's to the crazy ones, the misfits, the rebels, the troublemakers, the round pegs in the square holes… The ones who see things differently – they're not fond of rules. You can quote them, disagree with them, glorify or vilify them, but the one thing you can't do is ignore them because they change things… Because the ones who are crazy enough to think they can change the world are the ones who do. Think different." - Steve Jobs.

#EastMeetsWest

World Speech Day: Unity is the Way of the Future

Thank you to World Speech Day Kuala Lumpur and CV+ for the incredible opportunity to speak and share my thoughts on this important topic.

The Amirah Logo: A Backstory

I'm excited to share the story behind the design of my logo today. It's a tale that's deeply rooted in my fascination with Indonesian culture and the rich symbolism of the 'Kayon' - a captivating element found in the traditional shadow puppet art form known as 'Wayang Kulit'.

As many of you know, I've long been enamored with the mesmerizing sound of the Gamelan, the traditional ensemble music from Indonesia, and its influence can be heard throughout my work. But it was the 'Kayon' that truly captured my imagination from the very first moment I laid eyes on it.

The 'Kayon's' resemblance to the letter 'A' (my first initial) immediately piqued my interest, and the intricate details of its design, as well as the profound stories it represents, felt incredibly resonant with me. In fact, another name for the 'Kayon' is the 'Gunungan', which translates to 'The Tree of Life' - a concept that deeply resonates with my own love for nature and the interconnectedness of all things.

As I delved deeper into the significance of the 'Kayon' in Indonesian puppet art, I was struck by the way it symbolizes the cyclical nature of life. Used at the beginning and end of performances, the 'Kayon' reflects the belief that all of life, including its beginnings and endings, is part of an eternal, interconnected cycle. This idea of duality and the blending of opposites - the ancient and the futuristic, the Eastern and the Western - perfectly encapsulates the artistic vision I've always had for my music.

With this inspiration in hand, I began researching 'Kayon' designs, saving the ones that resonated with me and experimenting with sketches on paper. As a visual and kinesthetic person, I wanted to explore the design from multiple angles, fine-tuning the details until I had a shortlist of my favorites.

The next step was to bring my ideas to a few graphic designers, but I quickly found that translating an artist's vision into a cohesive logo design is no easy feat. Some of the initial designs were too cute, too feminine, or too corporate - missing the delicate balance of tradition and modernity that I was seeking.

At one point, I even considered giving up, until someone suggested I try 99designs, a platform that facilitates design contests. Though I was initially hesitant about the competitive approach, it ended up being the solution I needed. After a month of constant digital correspondence and sensory overload, I finally landed on the perfect logo design.

The journey was not without its challenges (and major sensory overload!), but the end result is a logo that I'm truly proud of - one that beautifully captures the essence of my artistic identity and the cultural duality that has always been a part of my creative expression.

I hope you've enjoyed this behind-the-scenes look at the story of my logo. It's a tale that speaks to the power of cultural exchange, the importance of perseverance, and the magic that can happen when we're willing to step outside our comfort zones and embrace the unfamiliar.

Below are some of the images I went through before settling on the final one:

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#3rdCulture #EastMeetsWest #Minimalist

An Interview: Embracing Authenticity and Unity

Hi Amirah.  Thank you for taking time out of your busy day to interview with me.  Please tell us about yourself? 

Hi Sylvia. My name is Amirah, and I'm a singer-songwriter originally from Malaysia, currently based in Los Angeles. I'm passionate about fusing traditional instruments and Eastern influences into my modern, cinematic sound. At the heart of my music and creative vision is a deep desire to promote unity and bring people together through my art.

Hmmm, how interesting. I took a few minutes to listen to one of your songs, “You Are My Land’ and the tempo and words were just beautiful. You are very talented.  What does success mean to you?

For me, success means being true to myself and fulfilling my calling to unite people through music. It's not about external measures, but about having the freedom to express my authentic self and make a positive impact.

How do you create work-life balance?

I tend to hyperfocus when I'm working, so, for example, whenever I notice the sun setting, it's a good cue for me to stop working for the day. The beautiful colors in the sky during the golden hour helps drag me away from work and go for a walk or hike. I've found that unplugging from digital devices on the weekends and immersing myself in nature, like going for hikes, is essential for me. My morning routine of meditation, journaling, affirmations, and exercise is also very important.

I like that. I think it’s important to disconnect and unwind. I like to sit and be quiet often. It helps to clear my mind. In what way do you give back to your community?

I'm passionate about inspiring unity through my music and voice. I'm also an Autism advocate, and I lead a bi-monthly Asperger's support group online, sharing my own experiences and challenges as an autistic, female singer-songwriter.

What steps do you think are necessary for an entrepreneur who wants to move her business/success to the next level? 

Having a clear vision and a strong 'why' is crucial. It's also important to honestly assess your strengths and weaknesses to avoid burnout and stay focused on what matters most.

I agree. Knowing your why is extremely important. It keeps you focused on what matters. What challenges and opportunities do you see in the present economic environment?

Honestly, this has been one of the best times for me as an independent singer-songwriter. People are so much more open to working remotely. A huge benefit of this is that I don't have to live in the city, which is a life-saver for me, especially since I am an introvert. This suits me perfectly and I am enjoying it!

What books and resources would you recommend to other women in business?

“Lean In”by Sheryl Sandberg, “The Seven Day Weekend” by Ricardo Semler, and “The Effective Executive” by Peter F. Drucker.”

 How do you stay connected in mind, body, and spirit?

My daily meditation routine is essential. Spending time alone and in silence is a necessity for me. If I don't allow myself this time, I cannot think clearly and my senses become overstimulated.

What is your favorite quote to live by?

“When love appears, religion disappears.” – Osho

 What is your power word? Why this word?

Unity. It is the reason I am here on this planet, and it guides everything I do. I believe that bringing people together through my music is my true calling.

What is the most important lesson you learned after entering the music industry? 

Be true to yourself. Don't try to imitate others. Find a skilled and experienced vocal coach who can help you develop your unique voice without damaging it. Persevere, because the journey is worth it.

What advice would you give to beginning singers?  

Be true to yourself. Don't try to imitate others. Find a skilled vocal coach who can help you develop your unique voice without damaging it. Persevere, because the journey is worth it.

This has been awesome, so glad to meet you. 

Likewise. Thanks again, Sylvia.

#3rdCulture #EastMeetsWest #Unity

The Beauty of Brown Skin

I was born with brown skin. As a young girl, I didn't think twice about my skin color. But as I grew older, I began to develop negative feelings about how I looked because fair skin is highly desired and considered more attractive in much of Asia. This was confusing and made me feel bad about something that was beyond my control.

At school, friends would call me "hitam manis", which means "sweet, dark-skinned," and would hold up their arms next to mine and marvel at how much lighter their skin was. Feeling increasingly insecure about my appearance, I got to the point where I would rub baby powder into my skin, trying to lighten it.

The beauty standards promoted in Asian media, where Western ideals of fair skin are celebrated, only exacerbated my insecurities. The beauty marketers in these countries mostly push women to lighten their skin, not men, since it's women who are regularly judged on their looks and physical appearance.

Men with lighter skin also are seen as more attractive and desirable than their dark-skinned counterparts by much of the female public. I can't help but wonder how many more women and girls would benefit from movies that feature females with dark skin. There are so many beautiful and talented dark-skinned women, so why don't we see more of them up on the screen? Embracing diversity and putting more dark-skinned women in films would go a long way toward changing antiquated views of what it means to be beautiful and desirable.

We are beautiful just the way we are, regardless of our skin color. I hope that by sharing my story, I can inspire others to embrace the unique beauty of their brown skin and not let societal pressures dictate how they should feel about themselves.

#3rdCulture #Vulnerable

Alien in a Neurotypical World: One Aspie's Story of Finding Belonging

Feeling like an alien from another planet. That is how I have always felt my whole life.

I've always felt misunderstood. Not sometimes, but always, and for a long time, I didn't know why.

Growing up, I felt awkward and out of place.

I excelled academically, but I didn't enjoy school. I didn't like crowds or noise. I just didn't fit in. I had a really tough time understanding the people around me. I felt like an alien on another planet.

Books were my constant companion, blocking out the noise, people, and confusion. I carried them everywhere - to family gatherings, the store, school, in the car. With books, I could be myself.

When I finally found out I have Asperger's as an adult, it felt like someone had switched on the lights for me. I felt a huge sense of relief and was finally able to understand and know myself. Although, there were nights where I would cry uncontrollably at the thought that nobody would ever be able to understand me.

I am blessed to have close friends now, and I've also been lucky to meet other Aspie friends who do understand me. It has been a very long journey, but finally, I have come to accept myself for who I am and love myself for me.

"Be your unapologetically weird self." - Chris Sacca

#Unity #Neurodivergent

Emotions Are Meant To Be Felt.

Feeling one's emotions, fully and honestly, is becoming more and more uncommon nowadays. We self-medicate ourselves with distractions and addictions in order to not feel something we do not want to feel eg. loneliness, love, pain, loss and sadness.

Running away from our emotions can be detrimental to our mental health.

It is important to acknowledge and feel what we truly feel emotionally and find ways to express it in healthy ways. That way it does get bottled up and repressed. This can cause one to participate in unhealthy emotional expressions such as rage, violence and self-harm.

Emotions are meant to be felt. It is part of being human.

For the longest time, I was constantly running away from the feeling that "I was not good enough" and that "I was not successful enough". I would constantly keep myself busy by doing more work to "fix" this negative feeling of mine. However, it only got worse that way. It was only when I started to spend more time by loving myself, giving myself the rest I needed, time to focus on other aspects of my life other than work, setting boundaries to stop working, that I slowly started to feel more "successful" and happy with myself. I started to slowly feel that I am enough with all my imperfections and all the things that I have "not yet achieved."

a) What is one emotion that you constantly keep running away from? What is it that you do not want to feel?

b) How can you give yourself the feelings that you want to feel today? Eg. I want to feel loved so I will treat myself to my favourite drink and create a feeling of love for myself. Eg. I do not want to feel lonely so I will journal and attend a Zoom online Meetup to create the feeling of connection for myself.

#Vulnerable

Is Social Media or AI Our New "Friend"?

We reach out to social media or AI when we...

• Need answers.

• Feel confused.

• Feel lonely.

• Feel bored.

• Want to avoid conflict.

• Want to learn something new.

• Want to know what our friends are up to.

• Need to vent our anger.

• Need therapy.

• Find answers to the big questions of life.

What does this say about us?

#Vulnerable

Embracing Diversity, Forging Unity: Carrying Tunku's Legacy into the Future

Here are some quotes that I liked from Malaysia’s first Prime Minister, Tunku Abdul Rahman:

"We are all Malaysians. This is the bond that unites us. Let us always remember that unity is our fundamental strength as a people and as a nation."

"All talk on Islamic States is just an empty dream. No man in his right sense would accept a nation which bases its political administration on religion, and in a country like Malaysia with its multiracial and multireligious people, there is no room for an Islamic State."

"In the old days people never bothered about what others did, so long as they were free to do what they liked themselves. Today, one cannot sneeze without being corrected, let alone enjoy oneself. That's what politics have done to our society."

"We usually forget that apart from making a living on this earth, human beings live in societies and these societies have cultures. It is only through having cultures that mankind on this earth has an ordered and meaningful life. Music and drama are two of the many important manifestations of a culture. They are important because they represent the expressions emanating from the power of human artistic creativity."

It is my hope that all Malaysians will continue to act as one, united in our diversity. Regardless of race, religion, social status, cultural identity, gender or sexual orientation, we must come together as a nation. May this be the end of divisive race-based politics and policies.

Let us also push for the end of censorship in the arts and culture. No more banning of books, traditional art forms, music, concerts, and "controversial" speakers, artists, musicians, and authors. Malaysia's rich tapestry of creativity and expression should be celebrated, not suppressed.

We must embrace our differences and find strength in our unity. The path forward is clear. Let us walk it together, hand in hand, as one people.

#3rdCulture, #Unity

An Artiste

"Endures negative feedback.

Takes risks on a regular basis.

Does not create to satiate the audience but themselves.

Creates because they need to.

Works without the audience in mind.

Knows that they will oftentimes be ahead of the audience.

Knows to ignore their most vocal critics. It's usually more about the person who is criticizing than the work.

Knows the audience has expectations, but is not concerned with fulfilling them.

Is willing to go broke.

Knows the more you know, the longer you've been doing it, the harder it gets, even though you are that much more skilled.

Realizes that putting one's foot in the pool is the first step and most people are unwilling to do this.

Is willing to learn.

Knows that inspiration creates the best work, but that sometimes creation begets inspiration. In other words, once you grease the wheels you might be inspired to do something great.

Knows that those who respond first are the ones to be most ignored.

Knows they are not a brand. Brands are consistent, artists are not.

Needs to grow. Once they stop doing this, they're dead.

Gets frustrated but carries on.

Gets angry but doesn't respond.

Knows the most ardent supporters are those who are silent.

Finishes.

Is savvy enough to know they are not always the best judge of their work.

Has to create or they risk depression.

Is internalized. At best they can relate to another artist.

Is a member of a separate tribe. The public can appreciate the work, but can never really understand the germ of creation. At best the artist can relate to other artists.

Speaks through their work.

Their work needs no explanation, it stands on its own.

Is willing to change. The greats reinvent, the middling class rests on their laurels.

Is challenging their audience on a regular basis, if they're not getting a mix of feedback, both positive and negative, they're not doing it right.

Knows that execution is secondary to inspiration. Just because you completed it, that does not mean it's art.

Is gobbling up information in their field. Not so much to suss out the competition, but to marinate in the artistic field in which they endeavor. Writers read. Painters go to galleries. Musicians listen to music.

Knows that art is viewed in a context. And that by challenging the context people oftentimes can't understand what you're doing and castigate it.

Knows that if you listen to all the feedback you'll be unable to create at all.

Their best work is done when they're in a zone. It can't be artificially created, it's something you feel, not something you can explain."

- Bob Lefsetz

#Vulnerable

Overwhelmed by Gratitude

Thank you to all of my long-time supporters who have been continuously championing my music. You deserve so much appreciation and gratitude!

Lastly, I will never forget that it was you, my devoted supporters, who encouraged me to take the leap and sing my own original songs. Your belief in me gave me the confidence to share my authentic voice with the world. I am humbled and honored by your unwavering support.

This journey has been made infinitely more meaningful because of all of you. Thank you, from the bottom of my heart.

I wanted to share with you some of my favorite comments. I enjoyed replying to every single one:

"Wow wow wow! First of all, the voice... I felt it deep in my soul. Hair raising. Beautiful.  Secondly, I love the lyrics. They could be about a person but also about our world, our earth and our relationship to it. Right now America seems to be losing its way and this song is a beautiful cry for help. 

Remember who we are as humans and we will have a better world. Can’t wait for the next release, Amirah! You’re Gifted." 

"Wow Amirah, this is amazing ... good job with this great song. I couldn’t stop my tears thinking about my country which is in trouble now ....." 

"아름답고 순수한 영혼을 가진 아미라의 새 노래는 잊고 있던 나라의 소중함을 다시 일깨워주네요.특히 많은 개인들과 나라들이 고통받고 있는 이 시기에 이 노래가 많은 사람들에게  위로가 될것 같네요. 감동적인 노래를 만들어 준 아미라에게 감사드립니다."

English translation below:
"Amirah's new song with a beautiful and pure soul reminds us of the preciousness of a forgotten country. I think this song will be comforting to many people, especially at this time when many individuals and countries are suffering. Thank you to Amirah for making this impressive song" 

#Unity

Navigating the Spectrum of Emotions

Many of us are more isolated than ever. Because of this, we've had a lot more time by ourselves.

You've probably faced some unfamiliar experiences during these times.

Some may be pleasant and some uncomfortable...

• Noticing the birds chirping in the morning for the first time.

• Turning to constant distractions like TV or music to avoid our own thoughts.

• Constantly searching for ways to "kill time," questioning why we are trying to “kill time” in the first place.

• Experiencing panic attacks for the first time.

• Facing resurfaced emotions from something that occurred years or decades ago…

• Obsessively organizing and rearranging our living spaces.

• Feeling accomplished by our homemade meals, even if they don't taste perfect.

• Indulging in comfort foods like pasta for breakfast.

• Feeling the release of uncontrollable crying

You are courageous for facing these unfamiliar waters.

All your experiences and sensations are important and valid.

You are not alone.

#Vulnerable

I Hyperfocus Therefore I Am

NT: No work after 6 pm today. Do something relaxing.

Me: Okay.

(The next day.)

NT: What did you do last night?

Me: I watched personal development videos.

NT: I thought I said relaxing.

Me: But it is relaxing for me.

NT: (Slaps forehead) Come on, let's try this again. Stop working and eat this meal I prepared for you now.

Me: Okay, just give me one more minute to finish up this task.

(Three hours later.)

NT: Did you end up eating the meal I made for you?

Me: Uh, one more minute...

#Aspie #Neurodivergent

Confessions of a Social Escapist

Words that immediately make me start planning my escape route:

• Socializing

• Networking

• Weddings

• Large family gatherings

What about you?

#Aspie #Neurodivergent

Shhh...I'm Eating: Managing Sensory Overload in Restaurants

Me at a restaurant:

Me: (To the waiter) Can you bring all my dishes out at once with the check? You don’t need to come by my table anymore. I’ll let you know if I need anything else, deal? And can you turn down the music, too? I’ll leave you a big tip.

Waiter: You sure make my job easy.

#Aspie #Neurodivergent

Rearranging the Doctor's Office: Confessions of an Aspie in the Waiting Room

Psychologist: Would it have bothered you if the water feature in the waiting room had been turned on?

Me: (Thinking to myself) How does she know what I'm thinking???

Psychologist: Does this tabletop look okay to you?

Me: Well, since you asked... I think the printer should go a little more to the left, the stack of books a couple inches to the right. I'd move the black bowl next to the Buddha statue, and maybe move the candle out in front of them. I'd also rearrange the flowers in the vase and then move it over there. (Starts to stand up) Actually, why don't I just do it for you since I'm here?

Psychologist: (Clears throat) No, thank you, that won't be necessary. Please sit down. (Scribbles notes in her pad)

Me: (Feels a deep sinking feeling, realizing the possible revelation)

#Aspie #Neurodivergent

Nap Time at the Party: Confessions of a Socially Exhausted Aspie

Me at social events:

Me: I need a nap.

NT: Again?

Five minutes later.

NT: (Cracks door) You need to come down and talk to people. This is your fifth nap today. Everyone is starting to look at me funny.

Me: How about if you tell them I need to get to bed early? I am an early to bed, early to rise person. It’s the truth.

NT: Yeah, but it’s only 6pm. (Slaps forehead)

#Aspie #Neurodivergent

Aspie Problems: When Your To-Do List Includes Tasks 12 Months Away

NT: What are you doing?

Me: Looking for hiking shoes.

NT: But our hike isn't until next year.

Me: Precisely. I like to plan ahead so I'm not scrambling at the last minute.

NT: Okay, I see. What are you doing now?

Me: Packing for my trip.

NT: But your trip isn't until next month.

Me: Precisely. Planning eliminates stress!

#Aspie #Neurodivergent

Aspie Problems: Navigating the Minefield of Unspoken Expectations

Aspie problems:

• Doing too much.

• Doing too little.

• Doing nothing when something is expected.

• Doing something when nothing is expected.

#Aspie #Neurodivergent

Journaling as a Neurodivergent Coping Mechanism

I recently discovered that journaling can be a form of stimming for me. It's not always that I want to write - sometimes it's simply the physical act of feeling the pen glide across the paper that I crave.

Throughout the day, I find myself writing constantly - my to-do lists, my schedule, my ideas. But I also really enjoy the practice of journaling, both in my productivity journal and my personal journal. Though I don't do it as consistently as I'd like, there are periods where I journal every single day, and other times where I stop for a while.

When I'm feeling stressed or overwhelmed, physically writing out my to-do list or planning my day or week in my paper planner helps give me clarity. There's something about the act of putting pen to paper that allows me to organize my thoughts and not feel as bogged down by everything I need to do.

When I'm feeling troubled or confused, I often turn to my journal. I know from experience how effective it can be for problem-solving. Writing down my thoughts and asking myself questions helps bring up the answers I'm seeking. Sometimes I'm surprised by what comes out - I often have those "aha" moments, new ideas, and important discoveries.

My journaling takes many forms - sometimes it's a literal pros and cons list, other times it's just a stream of consciousness exploring a particular issue or topic, like energy management. There are even occasions when I avoid journaling, even though I know I need it, because I'm afraid of what might come up. But I'm trying to be more gentle with myself about that - the truth is always better, and writing it down sets me free, even in the toughest moments.

Journaling is a way for me to be a friend to myself. It reminds me to take the time to recover, to feel, and to press the pause button when I need to. As a neurodivergent individual, it's a practice that serves me well.

#Aspie #Neurodivergent